Holy Tears

On Friday, Max and I went to see the last of the Harry Potter movies. We got to the mall early to pick up our tickets, and thus had more than plenty of time to walk around. I felt better for being able to walk with few crowds around. Only the early morning walkers were getting in their laps. We were on our third lap when we came up behind an older couple. They weren't going fast. He was a bit bent. My first thought about them was about how good it was for them to be getting their exercise at a time when many older adults have given up.

We stopped at Brookstone where I sat in the massage chair. Maybe it was the physical relaxation but my thoughts were free to wander. I remembered the older couple on their walk, and I imagined myself at their age, and then suddenly realized that the one I had always assumed would be there walking with me wouldn't be. A few tears leaked out. A few more came when I thought about how much Jeff had wanted to see this last HP movie.

I know we will encounter a great many of these moments of a renewed sense of loss, especially this first year, but also in the years to come. I truly do believe that when we are in the heart of God we can never be separated from those we love who are also in God’s heart, but that doesn’t completely take away the sense of loss here and now.

It gives me comfort to know that Jesus who had the power of resurrection wept over the death of Lazarus. His tears and my tears, even though they don’t have the last word, are still precious and holy.

John 11:34-35

He said, ‘Where have you laid him?’ They said to him, ‘Lord, come and see.’ Jesus began to weep.