Coming to Full Bud

This past week I participated in the third of five Leadership Journey retreats. Each retreat has followed a season of the year. The theme of this one for Spring was “Blooming in the Midst of Muck and Mire.” Part of the rhythm of these retreats is that we work with a poem, reflecting on our own lives through its images.

One of the poems was “Camas Lilies.” We were invited to write a story about a time when we experienced ourself in full bud; a time when we knew we were lovely. This was what I wrote and shared with my small group.

In this season of my life, I feel more of the fullness of blooming than I ever have. It has taken years of working with the SPRC (Staff-Parish Relations Committee) at Christ Crossman to overcome so many negative experiences over the years. I had come to almost hold my breath waiting for the negativism of feedback to begin, as the Chair of the committee at my first church began every meeting asking, “heard any complaints?” Now I am learning to experience breathing in the blessing of being with those who share affirmation. In this fertile soil, watered by blessing, warmed by open arms, I have been more able to put down deeper roots, reaching towards the sun with my branches, allowing buds to develop into fullness and bloom. I have experience greater freedom to grow in this inviting space and also offer that space to others. Instead of shovels trying to roughly dig me out, the tines of gardening forks have softened the soil to enable me to flourish. It has taken a community of grace, for which I am deeply thankful.

Colossians 2:2

I want their hearts to be encouraged and united in love, so that they may have all the riches of assured understanding and have the knowledge of God’s mystery, that is, Christ himself.