When Someone Dies...

“When someone dies, you don’t get over your grief by forgetting; you get through your grief by remembering.” I read this on Facebook this evening. It is appropriate for this week. A college friend we loved died this week after a journey with cancer. In his caring fashion, as he realized that treatment was not working, he reached out thinking of his wife, and how Charlene and I have been through what she is now facing, losing a husband to cancer.

I have never forgotten Chip, though as so often happens in life, we got busy and did not stay in touch as much as we could have. We talked on occasion, once after Hurricane Katrina made them evacuate from Beaumont. We emailed a bit. The last time I saw him was eons ago, just before I started at Duke, and while he was in law school at the University of Texas in Austin. I took a solo road trip visiting family and friends along the way, ending with Chip. After he finished his final exam, we had a cookout with his law school friends—the first brisket I ever had. He went with me to visit my childhood hometown in Taft, and to see the white, white beaches at Corpus Christi. We waded in the almost bath-warm waters of North Padre Island.

I met Chip in our Fireside fellowship at the Wesley Foundation at UVA. Neither of us had signed up for the “Contract” meal plan, so many, if not most nights found us eating together in different eateries at The Corner. He took me to the Moot Court, when his father, a graduate of the law school at UVA, visited. That night, we were able to witness the great Supreme Court Justice Thurgood Marshall preside over the Moot Court.

I remember Chip’s deep intelligence and his compassion, and the light that would gleam in his eyes when he engaged in a discussion. Though they never, ever met in life, I wonder if he and Jeff, and Elmer might find a pause in their wondrous gazing upon the glory of our God to find common ground, and share a laugh about the naiveté of their two Wahoo women, and stand amazed at how we all grew into what God called us to be. Here’s to the memories! I hold them dear.

1 Corinthians 15:41-42

There is one glory of the sun, and another glory of the moon, and another glory of the stars; indeed, star differs from star in glory. So it is with the resurrection of the dead. What is sown is perishable, what is raised is imperishable.