As many of you know I have
been working on a doctorate of ministry in church leadership excellence for a
while. While I initially applied to the program thinking that this would be
something good to lead into retirement in a few years, God as usual helped me
walk backwards into the place where I am supposed to be now. All of this
work--this reading, this thinking, this writing—is for now at Christ Crossman.
In many ways, it has
confirmed that we have been heading in the right direction with the work we
have been doing over the last several years. And in other ways, it challenges
me almost to the nth degree. It forces me to take as unwavering a look as possible
into how I function as a leader, how our system at C2UMC functions
well, and how it misses the mark.
I was getting fed up earlier
this week. It seemed as though every page read and turned brought yet more
awareness of how I need to change, and how I need to lead some of that change
in our system. I confess that I was having a pity party inside my head and
heart, and my spirit felt weighed down.
Then I had two conversations
on Wednesday. One was with a staff member with whom I could verbalize some of my
realizations, and together we could reflect on what it could mean for us in
ministry. Being able to share lifted the weight a bit. The second conversation
was with a lay leader who was truly excited about some new initiatives. God’s
grace was flowing with blessing, and my heart was lifted more.
Matthew 11:29
Take my yoke
upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will
find rest for your souls.
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