Reconciliation

Jesus said, "So when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift.(Mt 5:23-24 NRSV)"

On Saturday, after a meeting at church, I divined, from a question asked by my lay leader, that I had offended a member. I had talked with her in the days preceding a surgery, and had called afterwards to see how she was doing, but hadn't talked to her, or visited her. I gave an answer to my lay leader, but it nagged at my heart all day long. I didn't sleep well at all. Part of my head was trying to justify my action (inaction), but my heart was grieving for the pain I caused.

She was at the first service on Sunday. I greeted her, but I could tell that she had bad feelings towards me. All during the service, the disquiet in my heart continued to grow, making it difficult to stay focused on the message. At the end of the service, I asked her into my office. As much as that part in my head wanted to offer an explanation or a defense, all I could say was, "I have offended you. I'm sorry." She didn't have to forgive me, but she chose to. Thanks be to God! During the second service, my heart, my spirit was much more free to focus on the Word and the people present.

When our words, actions, or even inactions cause our brother or sister pain or grief, especially once we are aware of it, no matter how hard it may be for us, our spirits will be lessened unless we confess and seek forgiveness. If our confession is received and forgiveness offered, then both our spirits can be freed. If forgiveness is not offered, there may still be grief for us, but we have honestly made a step towards reconciliation. We cannot control how another responds and chooses to act.

I don't like being in the wrong. I don't like being caught being in the wrong, but thanks be to God for those with courage to face us with accountability for our actions.