My Thanksgiving Litany

For my parents, they are on my mind a lot these days...

For my brother, friend of my earliest days, confidant in high school, solid love...

For my husband, who left many stories unfinished...

For my boys, who live in the depths of my heart, and yet in worlds of their own...

For Bill Brown, choir director who taught me that enunciating a consonant can make

            the temperature in a room drop 10 degrees...

For Jeanne Saunders, 12^th grade English teacher who taught me about transitions

            in writing...

For Al Biddle, drama teacher who gave me a chance to use my gifts backstage...

For Mrs. Trent, chem-lab teacher who saved me from study hall teacher with whom

            I had bad “chemistry...”

For Burnt Factory UMC, my first congregation who willingly or not taught me about

            being a pastor...

For Deborah Carr, musician, colleague, friend for whom I worked hard to go deeper

            than mere platitudes...

For Lee Sheaffer, mentor, district superintendent who made gutsy appointments

            for women and couples...

For Joe Pennel, bishop who gained my reluctant trust...

For Charlene, friend of my heart, who has heard me out so many times, and helped

            me define my guiding principles...

For Valerie, friend of my heart, who is faithful and gracious...

For Christ Crossman, congregation of those who have called for the best of me,

            and been there through some very tough times...

For many more whom I hold dear, and for many who are a challenge...

I give you thanks, O God, the One in whose Creating image I am made, in whose Redeeming love I find grace, and in whose Sustaining Spirit I find hope.

1 Thessalonians 5:15-18

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

The Word of the Week: Balance

Balance seems to be the word/concept of the week:

·      Praying: Every Wednesday morning as we engage in a prayer of embodiment bathed in scripture, we are reminded that we intentionally seek balance--whatever we do with one side of our body, we do with the other.

·      Talking: Being parents is an act of balance—providing enough motivation and encouragement, while also stepping back to let our kids do it themselves.

·      Reading: Riding a bike requires balance—which necessitates moving forward at the same time that we stay upright.

·      Reading: Chaos and order are in relationship together. “Chaos is necessary to new creative ordering.”[1]

Sometimes trying to find balance is like walking on a razor’s edge; it must be done with great care. Living in a moment that is balanced can be bliss; trying to find it in the midst of imbalance can be agony. It is easier for me to remind someone else that finding balance is a process. When we falter, it is not the end; it is simply time to take a breath and step out again, one step at a time. Saying it to myself is harder. So I am learning to take a deep intentional breath in, and breathe out slowly to re-center myself—allowing my ears to hear and my eyes to see where Grace is flowing in this moment. And I give thanks for those in my life who have been a part of God’s grace this week.

---

[1] Wheatly, Margaret, Leadership and the New Science, Third Edition, Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc., San Francisco, 2006.

Lifted by Grace

As many of you know I have been working on a doctorate of ministry in church leadership excellence for a while. While I initially applied to the program thinking that this would be something good to lead into retirement in a few years, God as usual helped me walk backwards into the place where I am supposed to be now. All of this work--this reading, this thinking, this writing—is for now at Christ Crossman.

In many ways, it has confirmed that we have been heading in the right direction with the work we have been doing over the last several years. And in other ways, it challenges me almost to the nth degree. It forces me to take as unwavering a look as possible into how I function as a leader, how our system at C²UMC functions well, and how it misses the mark.

I was getting fed up earlier this week. It seemed as though every page read and turned brought yet more awareness of how I need to change, and how I need to lead some of that change in our system. I confess that I was having a pity party inside my head and heart, and my spirit felt weighed down.

Then I had two conversations on Wednesday. One was with a staff member with whom I could verbalize some of my realizations, and together we could reflect on what it could mean for us in ministry. Being able to share lifted the weight a bit. The second conversation was with a lay leader who was truly excited about some new initiatives. God’s grace was flowing with blessing, and my heart was lifted more.

Matthew 11:29

Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Stepping Up

“Stepping up our functioning means more than just thinking about it; it means actually doing it with other people.” I heard a couple of variations on this statement this week as the Advanced Extraordinary Leadership Seminar in Bowen Family Systems Theory met.

Now, the thinking about it is important, too. Thoughtful reflection is vital in the process as it helps me to parse out where my actions are considered or merely automatic gut reactions. For the long haul though, I need to do more than just reflect; I need to act.

This is so true, as well, in my life as a follower of Jesus. It is good to think about what it means to be a disciple of the One who is God-with-skin-on, Love incarnate, the Word. What difference does it make to be a follower of the Jesus who ate with outcasts and the socially acceptable as well? I need to think this through and consider what it difference it will make in my life. If I stop there however, I am playing it safe. To be a follower of Jesus, I have to actually act on it. Otherwise, my thoughts mean nothing, zilch, nada.

Stepping up in my functioning means I have to actually do it with real people. Stepping up as a disciple means I have to actually act as a disciple in real time, with real people.

James 2:15-16

If a brother or sister is naked and lacks daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and eat your fill,” and yet you do not supply their bodily needs, what is the good of that?