Having a choice can make a huge difference

Having a choice can make a huge difference in how I face things. As much as I have worked with the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator over the years, one statement I read early on has really stuck with me because I found it to be true in my own life. I think it was from a series of little pamphlets that paired two specific types. This particular pamphlet was about Jeff’s and my types. The statement was in relation to how each type handled money. For my type it said that we prefer to have more control over our money not so that we can spend it but so that we can have the option to spend it. Having the option was far more important than actually spending it. That really rang true for me, as did what I remember what it said about Jeff’s type regarding money as being for the purpose of spending.

Much more recently I was talking with my coach about a particular issue that was troubling me. As we talked, it became really clear that the choice in the matter was entirely up to me. No matter how much pressure I might receive from certain quarters, the decision was mine to make. When I realized that, I felt much freer to make a decision that was different than the one I automatically tended to jump to simply in reaction to feeling pressured. Knowing that it is my choice makes my attitude totally different. I feel freer and more at ease.

Knowing this about myself gives me pause in how much space I allow others, especially my son. It doesn’t mean that I give over all decision-making by any means, but it does remind me that bit by bit, more and more needs to be turned over. How else will he learn even more about making decisions, and taking responsibility for his own decisions?

I wonder if this is why God gave us the gift of free will, so that we can learn to take more responsibility for our own lives, without holding others responsible for our decisions whether good or ill.

2 Corinthians 9.7:

Each of you must give as you have made up your mind, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.